=> Britain 74th in world happiness rankings
Sounds reasonable, you might think, until you actually read the article. Because here's how they measure 'happiness' (my italics):
Rather than measure Gross Domestic Product or GDP, the Happy Planet Index or HPI measures life expectancy, happiness and the environmental impact of different nations.In 'traditional' happiness surveys, you might agree with me that life expectancy and happiness would be worthwhile candidates for consideration. But environmental impact?
Incredible. You can picture the scene now. A young man has come up with a splendid new business idea to help serve the world better. His idea takes off, and with a large amount of buccaneering entrepreneurial spirit, plus a great deal of sweat, time, and nerve, he makes it all work and generates a huge amount of cash for himself (which is the free market's way of telling you that you're doing the right thing.)
So what does this happy young man do to celebrate his fantastic work in serving the community? Yes, he buys a Bugatti Veyron and sets off on a cross-European 'Grand Tour', visiting the wonderful historical sites of Piza, Florence, Rome, Paris, Vienna, and Athens.
He believes himself to be ecstatically happy as he zooms around the continent, quaffing champagne at five-star hotels and meeting more splendid young ladies than a virile young man can shake a cocktail dress at.
But no, stop there! Secretly, underneath, he is miserably unhappy. Because the Bugatti Veyron that he bought is 'environmentally unsound'. He should have bought a cheap folding bicycle instead. He would have been much happier, for then he would be in much better contact with his soul, which has been alienated by his purchase of the Veyron.
What a lot of Communoid cock. Will these Marxoid/Nazoid environmentalist Gramscians never stop trying to poison our language, to try to brainwash us with their insane green fantasies? I fear not.
In the meantime, if there are any 'miserable' Bugatti Veyron owners out there who feel like becoming much happier by swapping their car for my lightweight aluminium folding bicycle, then I will be happy - sorry, unhappy - to effect the trade.
I shall regard the miserable suffering of owning the Veyron as my own personal white man's burden. It will be my pleasure, sorry displeasure, to help you out from your terrible predicament of enjoying your wealth.