Over to the socialists in the blue corner

Though I can hardly stop myself laughing out loud these days as I think of the dreadful plight of His Majesty Gordon Brown, who appears incapable of taking even the simplest decision without looking like a fool, I still shudder when I think of what the alternative might be: The British Tory Party.

That these people are just a bunch of blue-rinse socialists is fairly clear, with corporate and rural welfare their own particular black holes for public treasury pelf. However, something even nastier lies within the core of this statist group. Take for example Tim Yeo, and I wish someone would, the Tory MP chairman of the Commons environmental audit select committee. He would like us all to be given personal limits upon our carbon-based product consumption.

Forgetting for a moment about the fascist nature of this imposition, just think what this would entail. Every person in Britain would by necessity require a unique government ID to control these 'personal limits' and virtually every product that we bought containing carbon, from charcoal briquettes through to pipe tobacco, would be rationed via this unique number. Your house and car would also need to be monitored 24 hours a day to check that you were complying faithfully with the glorious central government's energy edicts, there would arise an enormous black energy market ruthlessly cracked down upon by a government ecomentalist Stasi, and we would all end up living the bitter life of a ration-carded soviet-style prole. And this, lest we forget, is the Tory party!

Well, you can take the Tory party and stick it into a nuclear reactor if this is the clear-sighted vision of the future that we can come to expect from David Cameron's blue legions of statist busy-bodies. If this is the best they can do, God help us all when they get into government in two year's time.